In Memorium

Four years have gone that you aren't here,

The love I have is still so clear.

The void you left is smaller but present,

Our memories of you are ever pleasant.

Papa your advice rings true

To hold those close that we love, we do.

I miss your smile, your laugh, your sneeze,

But I see you in the things I do,

In Riley, in Conner, and Makenna too.

Life goes on as is evident

In my goals and accomplishments you are my catalyst!

Challenges

What would life be without challenges? Michael is in his final 7 weeks of the police academy. He has been attending evening classes with two Saturdays per month for about 120 days while working full time. On February 3, he was let-go from his job due to company restructuring. Surprisingly, I did not freak out like I did when this happened to us just after I found out I was pregnant with Riley. For some reason, I felt at peace with what was happening. I had been thinking about this exact thing for a little while before it happened, the what-ifs and how-are-we-gonnas. I think that I have finally allowed God to be back in control of what is happening with me and my family. It is hard at times to have the faith no matter what and to let go of the control, but truly after my accident, I KNOW that I am not in control of anything. I believe that God has a plan for our lives and that we are the path He has set for us. I also realize that for the next few months we are going to be on an extremely tight budget, but so far, we have been able to continue to pay our bills, provide for our children, and love each other. I get the overwhelming feeling every once in a while, but I pray and am filled with that peaceful feeling again and I know everything will be ok!

On a positive note...Michael has started the process to get hired as a police officer. He is scheduled to take his civil service exam, which is invitation only, for March 14 and the process will continue after that.

Photos I took of us...

Happy Anniversary....

Today, Michael and I have been married for 8 years. We have been a "couple" for 16 years. This was the first anniversary in those 16 years that we were not going to be able to be together and have dinner and see a movie. Michael, as part of his police academy class, was on duty for the funeral of a fallen police officer and left home that morning before we got up. He was then scheduled to attend class until late that night. I was very sad about not being able to be with him on OUR day, but did understand that sacrifices had to be made. I was going to get the house cleaned up and the boys were going to spend the night with my mom, just because they could. I had taken Makenna to daycare that day so that she could ease back into the routine of going to school. I left my grandmother's house around 2:30 to go pick her up from school. I asked the boys to go with me, but they were more content playing without their sister bothering to go with me, so I left them with Mama. As I approached the "bad" curve on Kathleen road, my life changed. As I entered the curve I saw the other car. I hit the brakes as fast as I could, but there was no place to go. The girl was in my lane headed straight for me and we collided. The trooper estimated we were going around 60-70 miles per hour total, if you add our speeds together when we hit. The last thing I remeber before the crash was thinking "Oh my God" and then the hit. My van ended up on the side of the road about 3 or so feet from going over into the ditch. The other car was spun around and facing the same direction as me in the middle of the road. The girl and the two passengers in her car were able to get out of their vehicle, walk around and no major injuries. I was in shock, the whole world was still moving, even after the vehicle stopped, and I was shaking all over. I was not able to open my door because it was bent too badly, the fire department pushed it open when they arrived. One of the passengers from the other car came over to me and made sure I was ok and that I had no kids with me. He had a cut on his face, the girl was very shaken-up, and the other guy was dizzy, but coherent. I called 911 as soon as I put my car in park and could see straight. Luckily, there was a good samaritan in the lane of traffic who happened to be a paramedic. He checked everyone and held my neck in a brace until paramedics arrived. All four of us went to the hospital to get checked out. Luckily, by the Grace of God, none of us were seriously injured. I ended up with a severe chest contusion, bruised feet, and bruised shoulder and my van ended up totaled with more than $14,000 in damages.

December 27, 2011 will never be a day I will forget. I am so thankful for the little things that happened that day so that my children were safe and kept from harm, that I was not injured more seriously, and that the people in the other car were kept safe as well. I am thankful for airbags, for the technology of today's vehicles, for 911, and for my family. I am thankful for people who are willing to stop and help, even if it inconveniences their day, that there are some people who are still concerned about the well-being of their fellow human. I am thankful that I was able to walk away from such a crash and be home that night for my babies.

Michael and I ended up spending the evening with eachother after all, but it was definately not the anniversay I had in mind, but am glad for the lessons learned and the time I still have!

The last 4 months...

So, I have been extremely busy the last 4 months. It is really tough being home alone with the kids most of the time. Michael has been super busy going to work and going to school. He is literally home long enough to change his clothes every day and to sleep. It is crazy, but he only has 109 days left of the academy. Here is a recap of the things we have been up to since August:

September:School has begun and Conner and Riley are doing great. Makenna is also adjusting well to going to daycare without her brothers. She has dance class every Friday as well.

October: Halloween is super fun. This year the kids dressed up as a Kitty Cat, Darth Vader, and a Vampire. Daddy was at school and couldn't trick or treat with us, but he did go to the corn maze with us!

November was a pretty calm month. We had Thanksgiving dinner at my mom's house and at Aunt Telena's house. Lots of good food and family time.

December is upon us now. Today is Christmas Eve. The kids are all very excited about the visit from a very special guest this evening and we are getting ready to spend some time with our extended families tonight. We did get to visit ICE at Gaylord Palms this year, thanks to a special offer for 50% off. It was really cold and everyone enjoyed seeing all the sculptures. Christmas is going to be fun and I am glad Michael doesn't have to work, like he normally does on Sunday so at least we get him for a whole day!

A new chapter...

As the 2011-2012 school year commences, my little family is beginning a new chapter of our lives. I have had my career for 8 years now and enjoy what I do, working with kids in the school. Michael is now entering the final stages of his career search as he started the police academy last week. For the next 8 months I am going to know somewhat what it feels like to be a single parent. Michael will be in class 5 nights a week after he gets off of his full time job as a truck driver. I will see him for approximately 30 minutes a day everyday except Saturday and Sunday. He will be exhausted, working his butt off to achieve his dream of becoming a police officer. I am excited for him, but also nervouse for our family because with every new thing comes adjustments and challenges. This year we also have two school-aged kids with Riley in first grade and Conner in kindergarten, so that is two times the homework, two times the lunch money, two times the uniforms, and two times the fun of learning new things. It has only been a week since school started for everyone in our house and I can say that I truly appreciate having my partner with me as opposed to doing the routine all by myself. Michael definately knows how to push my buttons, but he does a lot for us at home and really helps our household to run more smoothly. I know these next months are going to be challenging, but I see a bright future for all of us when he if finished!

Some semi-recent photos...

Ahhh...the love

Nothing beats camping in the living room!

Baseball Brothers on the Fourth!

Conner's pre-K graduation!